Newborn sleep - What should I expect in the early weeks?
Newborn sleep is unpredictable — and that’s completely normal. This post explains what early sleep really looks like, why babies wake so often, and how parents can support rest without unrealistic expectations.
Baby sleep in the early days and weeks can feel a bit overwhelming. Newborns might only ever sleep on you, or be asleep in the day and then awake all night!
Within a few weeks, their circadian rhythm develops and they get their days and nights sorted out. Most will naturally fall into a predictable sleep pattern without you needing to put them onto a schedule.
In the past, strict feeding and sleep programmes were very heavily emphasised for very young babies. Whilst this was well meant and successful for some babies, it wasn’t [and isn’t] the best approach for all.
All babies are different, and in the early weeks, it’s all about responding and getting to know your own baby.
This guide is about how things tend to progress sleep-wise with babies. It also has some practical steps that you can follow to help them sleep their best.
“Bad habits” can’t be learned by a baby under 3 months old and it is important to be very close and respond to their needs.
0-6 weeks
The most important ways to help your baby sleep in the early weeks and feel contented and settled are:
- To feed them on demand.
- To allow their sleep patterns to develop naturally. Don’t wake them – unless they are tiny and haven’t been fed for a long time.
- To set their internal body clock by allowing them to experience daylight and darkness.
- Through holding, handling and gazing at your baby, allow the lovely process of bonding to take place.
In these early, precious but exhausting early weeks, sleep is quite light and fidgety. New babies have nearly double the amount of rapid eye movement [REM] sleep than adults do. This kind of sleep, called “active sleep” in babies, is very important for their neurological development. Both babies and adults need REM sleep for memory consolidation and learning.
Feeding
If you’re breastfeeding, the first food your baby gets from the breast is called colostrum. This amazing substance provides all that a baby needs for the first few days of their life, before mature milk is made. It is very high in carbohydrates and protein and yet low in fat, which makes it extremely digestible as first food. It has mild laxative properties, which helps your baby to do their first poo [sticky black meconium.]
Colostrum is also rich in antibodies, and this protects the intestines and lungs as well as offering them a defence from viruses and bacteria.
Because colostrum is so packed with good things, your baby only needs small amounts of it. This is perfect, because at first they will be too sleepy to take big feeds.
After the first few days, your breasts will produce milk and whether you’re breastfeeding, formula feeding or combi feeding, it is quite usual to feed every 2-3 hours…….and sometimes even more, especially in the evening.
In the evening and during the night, breast milk contains high levels of the natural sleep chemical, tryptophan. So “cluster feeding” at this time, not only allows your baby to stock up on food for the night, it also helps to improve the quality of their sleep.
It might not feel like it, but babies of this age sleep for an average of 14.5 hours in 24 hours. [The range however is 9-20 hours.] If you think that your baby isn’t getting this much sleep, why not keep a simple sleep diary? This will give you a clearer picture of their sleep tendencies and will enable you to see if any pattern is beginning to emerge.
The 4th Trimester
If your baby doesn’t want to go into their crib, this is normal and you don’t need to worry about it. The month or so after a baby is born is often called, “The 4th Trimester.” Literally, they are still physically attached to you!
Although this is a very precious time, it can also be exhausting and emotional. Sometimes, you just need to put your baby down in their crib for a while – even though you love them more than anything else in the world!
Practical sleep steps
At 0-6 weeks, to encourage your baby to settle into a sleep pattern they need:
Enough milk and to establish feeding. If you are breastfeeding this means feeding on demand. If your baby seems to be permanently attached to you, it’s exhausting but it’s normal! For formula-fed babies, follow the guidelines on the pack or allow 2 ½ oz [75 ml] in 24 hours per pound [0.45 kg] of their body weight.
A cosy and safe place to sleep is essential of course! For the first few weeks, this might be mainly in your arms. Ask for and accept offers of help. Staying close keeps them safer and it also lets them ‘share’ your circadian rhythm until they start to produce their own sleep hormones.
Allow them to experience light during the daytime, and darkness at night. This will encourage the development and production of Melatonin – an essential sleep hormone.
Have the bedroom as dark as possible and if you need a night light, use a red one.
Don’t change your baby’s nappy during the night unless it is very wet or soiled. Keep a Thermos with warm water and cotton swabs close by for nappy changes.
Keep your baby warm but their sleep space cool. The ideal room temperature should be around 18° C.
For important safety advice about babies’ sleep environment, visit The Lullaby Trust.
6-12 Weeks
At this lovely age, your baby is becoming much more active in the daytime and may even begin to sleep for between 6 – 12 hours at night. They may settle into 3-4 daytime naps, totalling 4-6 hours. Typically, their total sleep is about 13-16 hours.
Rather than going to bed at the same time as you do, they will now be producing their own sleep hormones and will start to need an earlier bedtime. This is usually sometime between 6 pm & 8 pm.
Practical Steps
To encourage good sleeping habits at this age, keep up with the steps above. In addition, encourage your baby to sleep without falling asleep on the bedtime feed.
Do this by giving the final feed with the bedroom light kept on and preventing them from dozing.
A “split feed” where you give one-half of the feed before bath time and the other half after it, can often help to prevent a baby from falling asleep on the last feed of the day.
Once they start to get sleepy and/or you think they have had enough; take them off the breast or bottle and hold them upright against your shoulder. Move gently from side to side whilst humming, shushing or singing. Stroke the base of their back to bring up any wind and then when they are relaxed [not too drowsy] and awake, try placing them in the cot. If you need to, continue to soothe them by stroking, singing etc.
There is no need to prevent your baby from falling asleep over every single feed. Try at first, just for the one closest to your baby’s bedtime.
12 – 16 Weeks
At this lovely age, your baby is becoming much more active in the daytime and if they weren’t sleeping for long stretches at night before, they will usually start to now. Once again, expect stretches of 6 – 12 hours at night, with 3-4 daytime naps. This should total about 12-15 hours.
Their own bedtime
Rather than going to bed at the same time as you do, they will now be producing their own sleep hormones and will start to need an earlier bedtime. This is usually sometime between 6 pm & 8 pm.
Practical Steps
To encourage positive sleep associations at this age you need to establish a bedtime routine.
A good bedtime routine is a repeated series of steps leading up to bedtime, each of which provides a ‘sleep clue’ which tells your baby that sleep time is coming. If repeated consistently, it will help them to feel safe, comfortable and sleepy.
The best bedtime routine
- Offer a final [short] daytime nap at around 5 PM. This will help to prevent them from becoming over-tired at bedtime.
- Tidy up the daytime things and prepare all that you need for the night.
- Turn off the TV, radio etc. and take everything that they need for the night to the bedroom.
- They will need an awake window of 1.5 – 2 hours, depending on their age and/or their natural pattern, before settling down for the night.
- Bath them every night if you can. Even if your baby is clean, it is good to bathe them as a very powerful sleep clue. It also allows them to expend reserves of energy.
- Introduce an ‘action’ song in the bath, you will both enjoy it and it will serve as another [highly portable] sleep clue.
- If you can’t or don’t want to bathe them, still have some kind of washing ritual.
- After this, go directly to the bedroom. Don’t be tempted to take them back into the main living area, or you’ll find that rather than making them sleepy, the bath has left them ready to play!
- When you’re in the bedroom, keep the atmosphere calm, with soft lighting etc. If you normally give a massage, now is a good time to do it.
- Give your baby a bottle or breastfeed [still with the light kept on] and then afterwards, look at a simple book together, sing a familiar lullaby or repeat a consistent goodnight phrase.
- Then place them in the cot – whilst they are still awake and relaxed.
- If they are in the cot awake but not crying, just watch and wait.
- Babies have an inbuilt natural ability to sleep if we let them. It may take several minutes of fussing, arms flying and legs kicking before they eventually get themselves off to sleep. It’s really good to give them as long as they need and try not to intervene.
- If your baby struggles to settle, stay with them, patting and stroking, singing and rocking until they are calm enough to sleep. Pick them up every few minutes if they need it.
- It is better to gently ease them into falling asleep independently rather than letting them cry intensely.
- The sequence of your routine is more important than the time at which it is done. If 6-8 pm is too early for your baby, just follow the routine a little later.
- Most babies, as they get bigger and older start to feed less during the night, and some, by the time that they get to this age, will have dropped night feeds completely.
- If your baby starts to feed in the night more rather than less as they get older, they may be developing a feed/sleep dependence.
- Unless you’re both happy with the way the nights are, you might want to look at one of my other posts either about the 4-month sleep regression or helping them to safely drop their night feeds.
Your own sleep
Lack of sleep is a normal part of being a parent of a newborn but it does get better. Whilst you’re in the thick of it, you have to sleep when you can. This might be during the day when your baby is sleeping or when someone you trust holds them for an hour or so. If you can’t sleep, then at least lie down somewhere warm and comfortable and rest your body.
If you are co-sleeping with your baby, you are not on your own and you shouldn’t feel guilty about it. Whether sharing the bed with your baby was planned or not, you’ll find advice and support about how to do it safely in my co-sleeping blog.
Daylight exposure is as important for your own sleep as it is for your baby’s. Try and go out for a walk and if you can’t, then at least have the curtains open during the day.
Nourish your body with good food and make sure you keep hydrated. You will naturally be focussing on your baby’s needs but you also need nourishing and nurturing! Limit your caffeine and your alcohol intake as these both have a negative affect on your sleep.
Further help
- If you’re struggling with your baby’s sleep either now or in the future, I am here to help you.
My books
My bestselling books give you the tools to help your baby and yourself get a good night’s sleep. They are full of expert, practical advice and case studies. Each book teaches you to create your baby or child’s personal sleep plan and is written in a clear and accessible style.
They are available in all formats from Amazon and other booksellers.
My self guided sleep plans
When your baby is a bit older if you need help with their sleep, have a look at my sleep plans!
My plans are a mix of video, graphics and easy-to-read text. They are a great way to access my expert help – from your phone, tablet or laptop. The plans have no expiry date and are updated frequently. The Settled sleep plan is very comprehensive, easy to dip in and out of and is very empowering.
The Settled Mornings plan is concise and accessible – it takes around an hour to complete and it may be the best hour you’ve ever spent!
Both of the plans contain helpful schedules for day and night time sleep.
My 1:1 consultations
If you choose to book a one-to-one consultation with me, you will receive my expert advice along with a copy of my Gentle Sleep Solutions book and four follow up support emails.
You will be in very safe, experienced hands and I treat every parent and child with kindness. As a qualified health professional, I can help if your baby or you have medical needs. I have helped over 15,000 families from all over the world to get a good night’s sleep.
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